The Boys Of New York, Mocumentary Script, Getting Locked Out Of The Damn Office

{First scene, Ponyboy is walking outside, doing a tour of the area}

Ponyboy} You see that house over there, that one, yeah, I used to know some guy who lived there, he used to make lanterns for the traffic wardens, cause you can’t really see shit in the dark, but his name was MR Reed, one day I went to go and say hi to him, so I turned up at his door and said hi, and I said ” Are you alright, bro, you look a little tired ” and he said, ” well you know how it is, you make lanterns and you get sleepy ” and I was like, ” Lanterns don’t make you sleepy, don’t they ?” and he is, ” Oh yes, of course they do, they have spirits in them ” and I was just weirded out so I just left his house and went home, then all night, I was worried and concerned about him, cause obviously, he didn’t sound ok in the head, went to bed really worried sick, then the next day I stop by at his house and I don’t see the guy, I just see a massive lantern instead, and I was like, ” What the hell ?, this cannot be real life ” and later on, I found out that the lantern turned out to be the man, and he just turned into a lantern, that’s just what happens when you look too closely at a lantern, I guess, it’s a shame, and we were good friends as well, he was a happily married man as well, his wife wasn’t too happy, you could see through her skin, she had to roll her husband down the stairs cause he couldn’t walk by himself, crazy story though, but I still think about him, from time to time .

{Next scene, Ponyboy is at Dally’s house}

Ponyboy} Ok so basically, Dallas is letting me stay at his condo for a few days, isn’t that right, Dally ?.

Dallas} Yeah, I’m only letting him stay over at mine because he’s having some trouble at his house, so I’m letting him stay here .

Ponyboy} Yeah, turns out, my brother, Darry had a little incident with the mail man, he basically punched him and the cops found out and they fined him, he had to pay 500 dollars because he refused to come to the station to get him handcuffed, but it’s ok now, because he payed the fine and the cops don’t care anymore . { Then he starts unpacking his bag}

Dallas} Do you want help with that, Pony ?.

Ponyboy} No it’s alright, I got it . { Then he loads all of it his spare bed}

Dallas} Just one more thing, don’t spill soda on the bed sheets, I went to the dry cleaners and got them washed, yesterday, don’t get coke stains on them .

Ponyboy} Understood, understood .

{Then they just stare at the camera}

{Next scene, everyone is in Reggie’s office}

Ponyboy} Jesus Christ, Reg, don’t you have anything else to do, accept for doing a staring contest with Steve .

Reggie} No, are you crazy, I’m not doing a staring contest, we are just waiting patiently for Dallas to turn up, he’s taking a bit long .

Ponyboy} Ok, I don’t think you’ve known him long enough to know what he does in his free time .

Reggie} What, what does he do in his free time ?.

Ponyboy} He dresses up as a clown and makes several attempts to fly .

Johnny} Oh my god, have you got any evidence for that ?.

Ponyboy} Yes I do, I moved in to stay at Dally’s condo and I see him doing weird shit, believe me, he’s your average mad man .

{Then suddenly, Dallas turns up wearing a long black jacket and wearing some sunglasses including a pair of flares}

Johnny} Oh my good lord, is that what I think it looks like ?.

Two Bit} What the hell is he wearing ?.

Ponyboy} Oh god . { Face palms}

Dallas} It’s Dallas Winston, motherfuckers, here I am, boy .

Reggie} What are you wearing, Dally ?.

Dallas} This is what you call class .

Ponyboy} But where is the class, that’s not class .

Dallas} You’re looking at it, Pony, smell the class .

Ponyboy} Ehhhhh get away from me . { Then he leans back}

{Ponyboy’s read}

” We wait patiently in the office, waiting for Dallas to turn up, then the next thing we know, he comes in wearing a long fabric jacket with shades and flares, honestly, what does he think he looks like in that jacket of his, honestly, he looks like Uncle Fester ” .

{Dally’s read}

” I put on this jacket of mine and look at me, I feel like a new man, I feel proud, I used to just dress in rags, but now I feel like I’ve made something ” .

{Ponyboy’s read}

” I can’t even see his neck, where’s his neck gone ?” .

{Back to the office, and everyone is sitting down}

Reggie} You never told us that you were gonna turn up wearing this .

Dallas} I don’t need to tell you, I don’t need to tell you anything, you should expect this sort of thing, yeah, like you wear something different .

Reggie} Listen to me, Dal, I bought this jacket from a cashmere store .

Dallas} Oh really, huh, it doesn’t look like Charity shop quality, you look like you bought it from Primark or something .

Reggie} Don’t desrespect my style like that .

Dallas} You look like a sack of potatoes .

Reggie} Oh ok, how about this then, Roberto Blanco called, he wants his jacket back .

Dallas} Who the hell is that, I don’t know who that is .

Reggie} Go and google it, all will be revealed .

{Steve starts singing to wind Dallas up} ” Is this the way to Amarillo ” { But sings it in German}

{Everyone just looks at him in confusion}

Reggie} Steve, please, not now, now’s not the time .

Steve} But seriously though, I have that guy’s phone number .

Ponyboy} What ????, how, what, when ?.

Steve} I got it yesterday .

{Ponyboy faints}

Johnny} Oh shitttttttttttt !!!!!! .

Steve} heh, I’m just kidding, I don’t have his phone number, I barely even know him .

Dallas} Oh thank god for that .

Two Bit} Dang Steve .

Johnny} Guys, what should I do, Ponyboy just passed out .

Two Bit} Lift his legs up .

Dallas} Or maybe you can carry him home .

Johnny} I’m definetely not doing that, but I’ll lift his legs up .

{Johnny picks him up}

{Then Ponyboy wakes up} J Johnny, what happened ?.

Dallas} Steve is gonna marry Roberto Blanco’s past wife and Roberto Blanco is gonna be your uncle .

Ponyboy} Oh my god . { Then he faints again}

Johnny} Dallas !!!, what the hell ?.

Dallas} Sorry, no heart in here .

{A few minutes later}

Steve} Guys, what do you think would happen if Roberto Blanco was to be Pony’s uncle ?.

Two Bit} I don’t know, if there is no curry and cake, I’m not going to the wedding, simple as that .

Reggie} No cause, ya’ll not gonna lead that guy down this path, if you do, I’m gonna have nightmares for days .

Johnny} If he does, I hope that he doesn’t make us go on Tv, do one of those cheesy concert videos, I’m not doing the Macarena, I’m gonna look gay doing it .

Steve} That would be a hit on Pony’s You tube channel .

Ponyboy} Are you kidding me, put that on my You tube channel, never in a million years .

Reggie} Do you know what, guys, I need to go outside and take out the trash, do you guys wanna lend a hand ?.

Dallas} Taking out the trash ?, oh hell nah, I’m not doing that .

Reggie} Dallas, I need some help with that, last time, I got in a fight with a resident who tried to steal my trash can, plus the wind almost blew me away .

Dallas} Reg, shut the fuck up, I’m not your night and shiny armor, you are old enough to do it yourself, you are fifty years of age, haven’t you grown up yet ?.

Reggie} Look Dallas, if I pay you 100 bucks, would you help me take out the trash ?.

Dallas freezes} How many bags do you have ?.

{Reggie’s read}

” Yes, looks like the trick has worked, go me, all I have to do now, is to get him to walk outside, I have a surprise that’s waiting for him, hah hah ” .

{Then they walk up to the trash cans outside}

Dallas} Jesus Christ, Reg, how much trash do you want me to take out, there’s like twenty kilograms of it .

Reggie} The more kilos, the better, now help me open the dumpster . { Then Dallas takes the lid off}.

Dallas} Fine, this better be a few minutes, otherwise I’m gonna lose my shit .

{Then suddenly the door to the office slams shut, leaving Ponyboy, Johnny, Steve and Two Bit locked in}

Dallas} Oh crap, you gotta be shitting me .

Reggie} What, what’s wrong ?.

Dallas} The door slammed shut .

Reggie} What ????? .

Dallas} Yeah, the door slammed shut behind us, everyone is locked on .

Reggie} Oh for goodness sake, ughhhhhhh . { Then he kicks the trash can over and then he walks up to a wall and leans against it with his hands on his head}

{Meanwhile, back inside the office, everyone is figuring out what is going on}

Johnny} Jesus Christ, what’s taking them so long, they should be back here by now, what’s taking them ?. { Then he calls Reggie}

{Dials the numbers and calls Reggie}

{Back outside, Reggie and Dallas are standing around}

Reggie} Oh for crying out loud, what’s this now ?.

Dallas} What is it ?.

Reggie} Johnny is calling me, what am I gonna tell him ?.

Dallas} Tell him that you are in the bar and that you are too drunk to answer .

Reggie} No, what are you nuts ?, I’m not telling him that, I’m telling him the truth, I’m gonna tell him that we are struggling outside .

Dallas} Alright then, whatever .

{Then Reggie picks up the phone} What is it, Johnny ?.

Johnny} Reggie, what are you doing taking long outside, why don’t you come back ?.

{Then Dallas walks closer and snatches the phone off him} ” Hey Johnny, this is Dallas, your buddie, I’m afraid that Reggie can’t answer your phone call at the moment, he is massively drunk ” .

Johnny} Dally, what the hell is going on, where is Reggie, I swear to god, if you kidnapped him and put him in your van, there’s gonna be a serious negotiation, we’re gonna call the FBI .

{Then Ponyboy hears Reggie’s voice on the phone and joins in}

Ponyboy} Dude, Reg, tell me what the hell is going on, you’ve been out for almost two hours, we are bored off our asses .

Reggie} Well it looks like we got locked out, we are gonna need to call a locksmith to come and have a look, are you sure that you are ok in there ?.

Ponyboy} Yeah, we are fine, Steve is losing his shit, but yeah, how long do we need to stay in here for ?.

Reggie} Well, you might have to stay in there for four hours, depends on when they are gonna turn up .

Ponyboy} Hey Reg, just one more thing, if you stop by at the gas station, get me and Johnny a slushy, and check if Soda is still working there, he said that he would be home by five, but just double check, alright ?.

Reggie} I’m not stopping by at the gas station, I’m not going anywhere near there .

Ponyboy} Oh come on, Reg, it won’t take long .

Reggie} Ok fine, your other brother texted me and told me to send Soda to stay at the office, he is concerned .

Ponyboy} Yeah I know, there’s no surprise there, I’ll keep a look out for him, ok Reg, I need to go now, Steve is jumping on the table, I’ll speak to you later .

Reggie} Ok bye . { Then he puts the phone down}

{Few minutes later, back at the office, Johnny and Ponyboy are talking}

Johnny} Oh this is so boring, there’s nothing to do, I’m bored .

Ponyboy} Yeah me too. ” Hey Johnny, I have an idea ” .

Johnny} What is your idea ?.

Ponyboy} Let’s go to the park .

Johnny} Yayyyy, ok let’s go, I could do with some fresh air, but wait, is everything alright with Reggie, I mean, he is gonna lose his shit if he finds out .

Ponyboy} I don’t think so, he’s in his own world, he can sort it out himself .

Johnny} Ok, let’s go, I wanna talk to the deers .

Ponyboy} The deers, really ?.

Johnny} Yeah, they are so cute, I always stop by and talk to them .

Ponyboy} Ok we should get going. ” Hey Steve, we are just gonna pop out for a bit, Johnny wants to go to the park, tell Two Bit that we’ll be out for half an hour .

Steve} Alright will do, have fun .

{Then they go outside, they escape by climbing out of the window}

{Then they laugh whilst they run together} ” Wooooo hooooo, yeahhh ” .

{A few minutes later, Pony and Johnny arrive at the park}

Johnny} Oh my god, look at those ducks, ahhhhhh, so friggen cute, oh my gosh .

Ponyboy} Yeah, this is so much better then staying in the goddamn office .

Johnny} Of course it is .

{Then they start walking further in and they spot two girls, their names were Marlene and Felicia}

Ponyboy} Oh my god, is that Marlene ?.

Johnny} Yeah I think so, she’s with her friend, I think .

{Then Ponyboy points at the camera and runs up to them} ” See, that’s my friend, that’s my friend, that is, Marlene, wait up ” .

{Then Johnny makes a facial expression}

Ponyboy} Hi Marlene, what are you doing here ?.

Marlene} Oh you know, just going for a walk, what about you ?.

Ponyboy} Same really, who is that, is that your friend ?.

Marlene} Yeah, this is my friend, her name is Felicia, Felicia, this is Ponyboy, Ponyboy, this is Felicia .

{ Felicia waves} Hey .

{Ponyboy waves} Hi . ” Oh and this is my friend, Johnny .

Felicia} Hi .

Johnny} Hey .

Ponyboy} Don’t worry, he’s a little shy, he’s not so keen on meeting new people .

Marlene} Yeah it’s ok .

{Ponyboy introduces Marlene and Felicia to the directors}

Ponyboy} Right so this is Marlene, she was my friend from school, we dated a little bit and then we left schools .

Marlene} Yeah . { She nods} I also brang my dog, her name is called Bubbles, she was going crazy for me to take her out for a walk, she shreaded the couch .

Felicia} But that’s what puppies do, don’t they ?, you gotta be ready for this sort of thing, or you’ll have absolutely no clue on what to do .

Ponyboy} That is very true, I’m more of a cats person, but I still love dogs, anything will do, to be honest .

{Back to normal, and Ponyboy, Johnny, Marlene and Felicia are walking around}

Ponyboy} Hey, do you want me to take the dog, are you sure that you can handle taking her where ever you guys are going ?.

Marlene} Oh um, yeah that would be great, thanks, Pony, be careful with her, she can go slightly crazy when she’s with a stranger .

Ponyboy} Oh come on, it’s not like I’m a stranger, isn’t it, we should be fine, we’re only go round in circles anyway .

Marlene} Ok it’s settled then, well, we better start heading back, we have a bus to catch, isn’t that right, Felicia ?.

Felicia} Yeah, the buses get crowded at this sort of time, but we’ll keep in touch .

Marlene} Definetely, just give me a call, you’ll know where I am .

Ponyboy} Ok cool, well we better get going as well, see you guys later .

Johnny} Bye guys . { he waves}

{Then they walk off}

Johnny} What are we gonna do with the dog ?.

Ponyboy} I don’t know, we’ll probably take it along with us .

{Then whilst Marlene and Felicia walk away, they have a conversation}

Felicia} Why didn’t you ask for his phone number, you idiot ?.

Marlene} Because I don’t wanna worm into his personal life, he’s got a life and so do I, and I want him to see that I have a life .

Felicia} So what are you going to do ?.

Marlene} We are gonna shopping .

Felicia} Why though, what’s the point of that, exactly ?.

Marlene} Because I wanna show him that I have a life cause you can clearly see that he is mad about me .

Felicia} But why do you do these sorts of things, Marlene, you’re making yourself look desperate even without tending to .

Marlene} Look, do you wanna go shopping or not, do you wanna go shopping or obsess over those boys ?.

Felicia} Shopping of course .

Marlene} Ok then, well, the bargains are on sale, so what are we waiting for ?.

Felicia} Let’s go .

{Then they hold hands and run to the shopping mall} Wooooooo yeahhh ” .

{Meanwhile, Ponyboy and Johnny are in a area at the park}

Johnny} Hey Pony, where are we ?.

Ponyboy} I don’t know, the park .

{Johnny tries to distract Ponyboy for a joke}

Johnny} Oh hey look, there’s a dragon . { Points at another direction}

{Ponyboy looks up} ” ooooohh a dragon, where, where is it ?.

{Johnny pushes Ponyboy against the wall} ” Sike, hahahaha, gottie ” .

{Then Ponyboy freezes in anger and then Johnny starts laughing and then Pony gets up and finds a stain on his trousers}

{Then Ponyboy screams} ” Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh ” .

Johnny} Hahaha you look like you shat yourself .

Ponyboy} You will die !!!!! . { Then he jumps really high and falls onto Johnny}

Johnny} No, ok, I think we should stop now .

Ponyboy} Don’t you fucking do it again, you fucking asshole . { Starts wrestling him}

{Meanwhile, Pony’s brothers, Soda and Darry turn up at the office}

Reggie} Hey, it’s good to see you guys, man, I’m so glad you came, with all of this chaos .

Darryl} Yeah I know, did anyone come yet, like the locksmiths and that ?.

Reggie} Yeah I have, they are having some trouble, they should be here soon . { Then he suddenly realized that Two Bit and Steve are not in the office}

Reggie} Wait, where are Steve and Two Bit ?.

Darry} Oh yeah, I think that Two Bit has gone over to stay at Steve’s house.

Reggie} What ??????, how did you know ?.

Darry} Dally told me, he saw him walking to Steve’s house .

Reggie} Ughhhhhhhhhhh, I’m just gonna call Two Bit and ask him what’s going on . { Then he dials the numbers and calls him}

{Two Bit picks up the phone} ” Hello, Reggie, how’s it going man ?” .

Reggie} What the heck are you doing ?.

Two Bit} I’m just at Steve’s house, we’re watching a movie, isn’t that right, Steve ?.

Steve} Yeah, I got a sweet blue ray DVD edition of Basket Case, and we ordered curry . { Then he shows Reggie the curry}

Reggie} Steve, what did I say about slacking off ?.

Steve} G, are you always this bossy ?.

Two Bit} Yeah, like aren’t we allowed to have a bit of fun ?.

Reggie} Ughhhh, like I need you to come back and help me, these idiots aren’t coming to fix the door, where are Pony and Johnny ?.

Two Bit} Oh, I don’t know, they never said, they just disappeared, I could get in touch with them if you’d like ?.

Reggie} No it’s fine, I’ll do it myself, I gotta go now, see you guys later . { Puts the phone down}

Darry} Right so, they’re not coming back to help you ?.

Reggie} Nah don’t think so .

{Meanwhile, Marlene and Felicia are shopping at the mall and they are trying on shoes, trying on clothes, getting Starbucks and just having the time of their lives}

Marlene} Hey Felicia, does this dress suit me, what do you think ?, should I buy this ?.

Felicia} Yeah, you should get it, it looks good on you .

{And there’s a whole montage of them trying clothes and laughing and everyone is just looking at them}

{When they are running around in the mall, Marlene gets a phone call from Reggie}

Marlene} Oh crap, it’s my phone, the youth worker is calling me, what do I say ?.

Felicia} Just tell him that you are shopping .

Marlene} Ok fine, I’ll tell him, just hold my shopping bags . { Then she gives her bags to Felicia}

{Then she picks up the phone, they talk at the same time}

Reggie} Marlene, why don’t you answer your phone ?.

Marlene} Hahhhhhhhhhhhhhh stupid boy .

Reggie} Whatcha say ?.

Marlene}  I said that you are a fool, why are you calling my phone ?.

Reggie} I was trying to get access to Pony’s phone but he doesn’t answer so I called you instead, I was thinking that you might know one or two things about what’s going on, cause no one else does .

Marlene} Reggie, what do you want from me ?, I’m right in the middle of an important situation and you just ring my phone .

Reggie} Where are you anyway ?.

Marlene} I am at the shopping mall with my friend, we bought clothes and stuff .

Reggie} What the hell are you doing at the mall, you’re supposed to be here with the rest of us, madam, do you know where the boys are, I tried calling them but they didn’t answer .

Marlene} Um, I think that they went to the park, we saw them earlier, I gave them my dog and they carried on with their day, I honestly don’t know why you are calling me for the information, I have no clue, so there you go .

Reggie} Marlene, could you do me a favor, please, leave the shopping mall and walk down to the office .

Marlene} Why do I need to come down to the office, I’m busy with shopping .

Reggie} It’s because the door is broken, we are locked out of the property, I’ve called the locksmiths and they are busy with other customers, they are not bothered, so I need you to get in touch with the boys and tell them to come down here at once .

{Then Felicia joins in the phone call}

Felicia} Shuttttttttttt, you don’t know what you are doing, keep telling us to come down to join you, are you crazy or something, I don’t give a damn .

Marlene} Hey Reggie, look we got starbucks, I got like a Macchiato and Felicia got a Frappuccino, it’s very nice .

Reggie} What the hell are you guys doing at Starbucks, Jesus Christ, I thought that you guys were the normal ones, you’re just like the boys .

Felicia} Is that a compliment ?.

Marlene} No, you dummy, of course it’s not a compliment, you need to go to school .

Reggie} Look, I just need you guys to come down here as fast you could .

Marlene} Yeah yeah yeah, see you next year, hah hah, you plank .

{Then Reggie hangs up and freezes}

Marlene} Hey Felicia, I wonder on how our puppy is getting on, I wonder on how much fun she is having with the boys .

Felicia} Yeah, she’s probably playing fetch in the park, we’ll pick her up later .

{Meanwhile, Ponyboy and Johnny are messing around}

Johnny} Hahaha, oh look, it’s a unicorn .

Ponyboy} That’s not a unicorn, silly, that’s a horse .

Johnny} Oh yeah, sort of like your name, Horse boy .

Ponyboy} Noooooo, my name is not Horse boy, it’s Ponyboy, stop calling me that.

Johnny} Ok fine, but seriously though, why did you call yourself Ponyboy ?.

Ponyboy} Because that’s the name what my parents chose, they first started off with Maverick, and then I begged them to change it, so then they named Ponyboy .

Johnny} That’s the weirdest origin story I have ever heard .

Ponyboy} Oh trust me, you’ll hear much worse later on in life . ” Hey do you know what that deer looks like ?”

Johnny} What does it look like ?.

Ponyboy} Marlene’s dog, Bubbles .

Johnny} Oh yeah, it does, that is very true, except it’s more cute, the deer kinda looks like an alien .

Ponyboy} Yeah, speaking of Bubbles, where is she ?, have you seen her ?.

Johnny} Um, oh shit . { Suddenly freezes and realizes that they lost the dog}

Ponyboy} Johnny, what did you do to the dog ?.

Johnny} I don’t know, she was here a while ago .

Ponyboy} You didn’t lose her, didn’t you ?, you shouldn’t have, Marlene is gonna lose her shit when she finds out .

Johnny} It’s gonna be fine, she probably went to see the deers, dogs are very intelligent .

Ponyboy} But how is she gonna know that we are here, she doesn’t have GPS .

Johnny} Oh come on, let’s just look for her, she’s around here somewhere, she has to be .

{Then they walked around the park, trying to look for the dog}

Johnny} Bubbles !, Bubbles, where are you ?.

Ponyboy} Bubbles, come to Daddy, come here, girl . { Then he whistles}

Johnny} Dude, that is not gonna work .

Ponyboy} I don’t see you making an effort .

Johnny} I am making an effort, I’m doing all I can to find her, look, why can’t we just call Marlene and tell her .

Ponyboy} Dude, no, are you nuts ?, I’m not calling Marlene, she’s gonna kill me and use me a broom, just keep it as a secret .

Johnny} Jesus Christ, this is gonna be a long day .

{Few minutes later, Ponyboy and Johnny are lying on a park bench}

Johnny} Dude, can’t we just find this stupid dog already ?.

Ponyboy} I don’t know where she is, I wish I did, honestly .

{Meanwhile, Reggie is outside the office waiting for the locksmiths to come}

Reggie} Jesus Christ, where are these idiots, I’m so surprised on why they got hired in the first place, they don’t deserve a job, why get hired if you are not gonna do your job .

Darry} Damn right, couldn’t of said it better .

Soda} How did the door slam shut anyway ?.

Reggie} So basically, I went outside with Dallas to take out the trash and then the wind blew and out of the blue, the door slammed shut, I know right, not so shocking, happens all the time in this place .

Soda} Let me tell you this story on what happened in our place where we used to live before we moved here in New York, so once, we used to live in Miami, and our parents rented out this small house in the city, nice little place, they weren’t that many people but it was fairly busy and one day, me and Darry went to the gas station and we came back, we found out that the door slammed shut and Ponyboy got locked in, he had to fight to survive, we had no food or water, but the only thing that we did have was a mobile phone, now when you have a phone, what is the first thing you that turn to ?.

Reggie} The locksmiths, right ?.

Soda} That is correct, we wrang the locksmiths and when they turned up, they just sat down by the door doing absolutely nothing, wasn’t doing his job, wasn’t doing anything, the only thing that he did do is smoke a cigarette, right, absolutely slacked off, in the end, we didn’t get the door fixed, so we had to move to New York, Miami was a good place, but the locksmiths absolutely ruined the experience, so just carry on doing your own thing, you don’t need to rely on anyone .

Reggie} So what are you telling me ?.

Soda} Dump the locksmiths, these ones don’t deserve your loyalty, fix the door on your own, just get a card or something, the door will open in no time .

Reggie} Ok, it makes sense now, I’ll just fix it myself, thanks Soda, you’re the best .

Soda} Now go fix that door .

{Meanwhile, Steve and Two Bit are watching basket case at Steve’s house}

Steve} Dude, wow, did you see that scene where the guy goes in the bathroom and he opens the basket ?.

Two Bit} Yeah, that scene is wicked and then the guy turns up with num chucks and starts going ape shit .

Steve} Yeah, you know I had an uncle who came from Thailand, I showed it to him, and he was like ” What the hell man, man come out of basket ” and I just couldn’t stop laughing the whole night .

Two Bit} Hahaha wow, do you think that he liked it ?.

Steve} Well from my perspective, I don’t think he did, he threw a pillow at the TV .

Two Bit} That’s hilarious, hey, don’t you think that the TV is a little too close ?.

Steve} No, why do you think that ?, I think it looks fine .

Two Bit} I don’t know, I think I’m going crazy or something, we’ve been watching this movie in a 10 hour loop .

Steve} Hmm, hey do you want left overs of the curry, help yourself to a beer as well, it’s just in a cooler box on your left .

Two Bit} Hmmm, don’t mind if I do . { Then he puts more curry on a plate and gets a beer from the cooler box}

{Meanwhile, Johnny and Ponyboy are still in the park}

Ponyboy} Dude, this is getting silly now, where the hell is Bubbles ?.

Johnny} No idea, it’s been five hours now, thought that she’d come back by now, Marlene is gonna kill us . { Then he suddenly gets a phone call from Reggie}

Ponyboy} Who’s phone is that ?, is it my phone that’s ringing ?.

Johnny} No it’s mine, it’s Reggie, I’m not gonna answer the phone, deal with his ever lasting shit again .

Ponyboy} Johnny !, just answer the phone, he isn’t gonna stop, do you wanna have him ringing you every minute ?.

Johnny} Ok fine, I’ll answer it, but I’ll put it on speaker phone . { Then he goes to answer the phone} ” Hey Reggie, what’s up ? ”

Reggie} Why aren’t you answering the phone ?, where are you guys ?.

Johnny} We are just in the park, did the locksmiths come yet ?.

Reggie} No they are not coming, they are taking long, I guess not, I’ll probably do it myself, you can get a kit for it, I’ll buy it Amazon .

Johnny} If you buy it on Amazon, it won’t come today, except if it’s same day delivery. But still, it won’t arrive today .

Reggie} Whatever, I hope it does, it better arrive today, we can’t live with a broken door .

{Then Ponyboy joins in the phone call}

Ponyboy} Heyyyyyyyy Reggie, hey man, how’s it going, you should see the deers here, they look wild, I wish you were here .

Reggie} No I’m alright, I’d rather stay here, your brothers are getting tired, you need to go home, they’re worried about you .

Ponyboy} Yeah yeah yeah, they’re always worried, it’s nothing new, nothing has changed, same old shit .

Johnny} Hey Reggie, did you go to the station and get our slushies ?.

Reggie} No Johnny, I didn’t, I was never planning to, never said, never did, never will .

Johnny} Oh come on, man, such a disappointment, it’s hot out here .

Reggie} Yeah I know, did any of you hear from the girls ?.

Ponyboy} What, Marlene and Felicia, oh yeah, we met them earlier this morning, they said that they were gonna go somewhere, we walked the dog, we did everything they asked, it’s all good, Reggie, all good .

{Johnny nudges him} ” Hey, don’t tell him about the dog, you silly boy ” .

{Then Reggie hears Johnny}

Reggie} What was that ?.

{Ponyboy whispers} ” Don’t freaking talk, you plank, now he’s gonna tell Marlene about the flipping dog ” .

Reggie} What about the dog ?, what are you guys talking about ?.

Johnny} Hey look, oh my god, oh my god, there’s a dragon in the park, I’ll talk to later, ok goodbye .

Reggie} What, what dragon, what ?. { Then he hangs up}

{Then Johnny and Pony start laughing and doing high fives}

Johnny} Oh that was sick .

Ponyboy} Yay yuh, we rule . I wonder what Marlene is doing, she’s probably disappointed in us, we lost her dog, we’ll probably never see her again .

Johnny} Yeah I know, hey, you know what, my dad always told me this saying, whenever I was upset about something getting lost, he always used to say, ” Don’t be upset that you lost something, just be patient and the thing will come back to you ” .

Ponyboy} Yeah that’s total bullshit, I don’t believe one word of it, how can she just come back like that ?.

Johnny} Well I’ll show you, { Then he shouting} ” Haaaaaaaa owowowow owow Eh ” .

{Then Ponyboy just looks at him like he’s crazy}

Ponyboy} Johnny, stop it, you’ll attract all the meth heads .

Johnny} Shut up, it’s working, don’t ruin it . { Starts screaming again} ” Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ” .

{Then they hear barking coming from nearby}

Johnny} Wait, do I hear barking ?.

Ponyboy} Oh yeah, it’s coming from down there .

Johnny} Oh my god, is that Bubbles ?.

Ponyboy} Yeah it is, he’s here,  she’s not lost at all .

Johnny} Well go on then, pick her up, we don’t want her to get lost again, don’t we ?.

Ponyboy} Of course not . { Then the dog walks up them with her tongue sticking out, happy to see Pony and Johnny} ” Bubbles, I’m so glad you came back, we were so worried about you, don’t escape like that again . { Then he hugs her}

Johnny} See I told you didn’t I, you just have to be patient and you’ll find it .

Ponyboy} Yeah, you screaming like a phycho . Don’t let her run off, keep her on the leash .

{Meanwhile, Reggie is outside, trying to fix the door himself}

Reggie} Right so, I think I know how to do this, now, so, oh I get it, you’re supposed to insert the card through the part of the door, at least, that’s what the person said, this better work, otherwise I’ll just smash the window with a brick . { Then he tries to fix the door}

{Then Soda stands by, watching him fix the door}

Soda} Is it working ?.

Reggie} I’d like to say yes and no at the same time .

Soda} Where did you get the tutorial from ?.

Reggie} I found a video on You Tube, I just searched up, How to fix a door .

Soda} Oh ok, but don’t forget, there are millions of scammers on those sorts of websites .

Reggie} Huh ?.

Soda} There are millions of people who don’t know what they’re doing, the door will be even more broken then it already is .

Reggie} Right, that’s just great. Hey, do you know where Dally is ?.

Soda} I have no idea, he should be at the gas station buying cigarettes, if not, go to Steve’s house, you might find him there .

Reggie} Wait, but why would he go to Steve’s house ?.

Soda} He goes there sometimes, I’ve seen him there before, he usually crashes out at Steve’s house if his other friend isn’t home, so just check before anything else .

Reggie} Oh ok cool, I’ll quickly stop by at the gas station then, that is my only hope, I have no idea where this parasite has ended up .

{Meanwhile, Marlene and Felicia left the shopping mall and ended up in the park}

Marlene} Hey guys, you alright ?, how’s my puppy doing ?.

Ponyboy} Yeah, she’s all good, after a long time in finding him .

{ Then Johnny nudges him} ” Shhhhhhh, don’t you dare ” .

Marlene} What was that ?.

Ponyboy} Oh nothing, it’s just an inside joke, we do these all the time .

Johnny} Yeah, we are good at making inside jokes .

Marlene} Hmm, so um, where is Bubbles, is she with you ?.

Ponyboy} Uh yeah, she is right here, we figured that we put it on the leash because er .

{ Johnny nudges him again} { Then Pony whispers and silently shouts}

Marlene} Are you two alright, is there something wrong ?.

Johnny} Um no, we’re all good, just the tree stared at us, here is your dog, there you go, go back to mummy . { Then he gives the dog back to Marlene}

Marlene} Thank you so much for looking after her, I am so happy that she had fun .

{Ponyboy nerviously talks} Yeah of course . { Then Marlene takes the dog and realizes that she was given a shoe instead}

Felicia} Oh my god what is that, oh my god, what is that ?. { Looks disgusted}

Marlene} This isn’t my dog, is this a joke or something ?.

{Johnny and Pony starts laughing}

Marlene} Ughhhhh, I deserve better then this, you stupid fools .

{Then Ponyboy and Johnny start waving} ” Hahaha, bye Marlene, bye Felicia, enjoy your new boot, or at least it barks, hah hah hah .

Marlene} Whatever . { Then she walks off}

{Then Johnny and Pony look at each other and laugh}

Johnny} Hahaha, that was wild .

Ponyboy} You could say that again . { Then they high five each other} { Then they walk back laughing their heads off}

Johnny} All for one and one for all . { They say when they fist bump their hands in the air whilst saying it at the same time} ” Made it ” .

{Meanwhile, Reggie is in his car and drives to the gas station to try and find Dallas, but he is no where to be seen}

Reggie} Jesus Christ, where is he, he’s not here, he has to be around here somewhere, I mean . { Then he goes in diversion and still doesn’t see him anywhere} ” What g, oh you gotta be kidding me ” .

{Then he goes to ask one of the staff at the gas station} ” Uh excuse me, excuse me, hellooo ” . { Tries to grab the person’s attention}

Person} You talking to me ?.

Reggie} uh yes, I’m talking to you, um, I was wondering if you could help me out .

Tim} You wanna pump your tires, they look a little flat, I could do you a deal, you could get your tires pumped for five bucks .

Reggie} What no, I don’t need air for my tires, that’s not what I’m here for, but what I am here for, is I’m just looking for a friend .

Tim} Oh really, what’s his name ?.

Reggie} His name is Dallas, Dallas Dalton Winston, have you seen him around ?.

Tim} Oh yeah, I know him, I have a colleauge who’s friends with him .

Reggie} Yeah, I think I know who you mean, do you know where he is ?.

Tim} Um, yeah, he won’t over to Buck’s house .

Reggie} Who is that ?.

Tim} Oh it’s just a friend of his, he crashes there sometimes, I can give you the address if you want ?.

Reggie} Oh ok, that would be great, thanks man .

Tim} No problem, it’s just the house on your left .

Tim} Bye now . { Waves}

{Reggie walks off and gets in his car and drives to his friend’s house}

Reggie} Jesus Christ, this address is confusing, it just says, 23 piss off avenue London w shite . { As he reads the address} ” This is weird, how am I gonna find this ” . { After some consideration, he finally found the address, he pulled outside of Buck’s house and parked his car, Reggie was furious with Dallas} { He knocks on the door}

Reggie} Dallas, I know you’re in there, just show yourself, I’m gonna punch your face, hahaha, you better watch out . { Then the door opens and he walks inside}

{ He awkwardly walks in on Dallas and Buck}

Reggie} Ahhhhhhhhhhhh .

{ Then Dallas and Buck turn around with an embarrassed look on their faces}

Buck} Can I help you ?, sir ?.

Reggie} Oh my god, ” can I help you, sir, what are you doing, you disgusting tramp ?.

Dallas} Reg, what are you doing here ?.

Reggie} What the hell are you doing at your friend’s house ?.

Dallas} Well, I stopped at Buck’s house because he wanted me to buy him some essentials from the store .

Reggie} Oh my gawd . ” You are gonna come with me, now mister, you make me come here by car . ” Get out now, get out now, get out now ” { Drags him outside}

Dallas} Reggie, what the hell happened ?.

{Reggie points his finger at Dallas} Woooooop ” .

{Then they get in the car and drive back to the office}

Dallas} I think we should turn on the radio, it’s really quiet in here .

Reggie} No, don’t touch it .

{Dallas doesn’t listen and turns on the radio} { Waiting On A Friend by The Rolling Stones plays and Dallas nods his head to the beat as well as Reggie but they stare at each other awkwardly}

{Meanwhile, Pony and Johnny walk back to the office after their park fiasco}

Ponyboy} Hi Reggie, how’s it going ?.

Johnny} Yeah, what’s up ?.

{Reggie just stands there, looking at them, doesn’t say a thing and just gets out of the car}

Johnny} What ?, why are you ignoring us, did we do anything wrong ?.

Reggie} Yes you did, you slacked off and went to the park without my permission, who’s idea was it ?.

Ponyboy} It was my idea but Johnny agreed to it, so it was both of us .

Johnny looks at him} Whatchi ?.

{Then Dallas gets out of the car}

Dallas} Hey guys, you don’t understand on how much fun I had today .

Johnny} What did you do ?.

Dallas} I crashed over at Buck’s house, we ended up watching a wood tappers documentary .

Reggie} Yeah, you are in big trouble, Mister,  I had to stop by at the gas station and hunt for you, Tim sent me down this address, he told me that you would be at Buck’s house .

Dallas} Oh that is hilarious . { says something else to not get on his nerves} ” Uh I mean, that is terrible, I’m sorry, man .

{Then suddenly, Two Bit and Steve turn up}

Steve} Wooooooooo, yeahhhhhhh, wow that was crazy, nice ramp tricks, dude .

Two Bit} Yeah thanks, I learned them yesterday . { Then they see everyone else standing together}

Steve} What the hell is going on here, why are you ?.

Two Bit} Why are you looking at me like a murdered someone ?.

Reggie} Steve, Two Bit, can you come join us for a sec ?.

Two Bit} Um ok . { Then they walked up to them}

Reggie} Right, would it be ok if one of you told me word by word of what you guys did today ?.

Steve} Wait but .

Reggie} No, no ifs no buts, just tell me what you guys did ?, I wanna hear everything .

Two Bit} Ok I’ll do it, um, I went to Steve’s house to watch a movie and we ate curry, we ordered this mean Rogan Josh from this Asian Food resteraunt  .

Reggie} I don’t wanna know that you guys had curry, I wanna know the other stuff, come on, spit it out .

Two Bit} And when the movie was over, we headed to the arcade .

Reggie} You what ?.

Two Bit} We went to the arcade, we were bored to the core, we wanted to do something with our life .

Steve} Yeah, and we figured that you wouldn’t notice if we did because you are wrapped up in this whole locksmith crap .

Dallas} Oh that’s so cool, what score did you get on the games ?, did you win any serious cash ?.

Two Bit} Um, we lost two hundred bucks on the Russian roulette but we one sixty bucks on the motorcycle game .

Dallas} Nice, can I borrow sixty bucks, please, I’ll give you two bucks in return .

Pony} No, don’t give him your money, he’s only gonna buy weed and cigarettes with it .

Dallas}  Hey, That’s not true, I don’t do that .

Ponyboy} Yeah, says the guy who smokes five packets a day .

Dallas} Oh shut up .

Reggie} Alright, cut it out, Pony, don’t even get me started on you, your brothers were so tired that they went back home, they had no idea what happened to you .

Ponyboy} I know, Reggie, it’s not a surprise, come over to my house and see what happens behind closed doors, you’ll want to yeet on outta there .

Reggie} I don’t know, don’t care, not coming over to your house . You guys need to apologize .

Dallas} Why do we need to apologize ?.

Reggie} Are you on drugs ?, are you on drugs ?, why do you need to apologize ? ”  It’s because I’m annoyed shitless, you guys did damage, what do you need to say for yourself ?.

Then they all say} Sorry .

Reggie} What was that, you need to say it again, say it like you mean it, well go on then, what do you say ?.

{They all put their hands up and wave them up and down with their hands in a knot} ” I’m sorry, I’m so so, sorry ” .

Reggie} Alright, you can go now, embarrassment . { Then he walks off} { Then Dallas stops him}

Dallas} Oh Reggie, I googled that thing up, who the hell is that guy, looks mad, has that pink jacket and shit .

Reggie} Oh did you, ok then .

Dallas} Wait, where’s my 100 bucks ?.

Reggie} What hundred bucks ?.

Dallas} Remember the hundred bucks that you promised me earlier, remember I did you a favor in taking the trash out ?.

Reggie} Oh yeah, I forgot to take it out of the ATM .

Dallas} You what ?, oh come on, that isn’t fair, I did you a favor and you didn’t give anything in return, what is that exactly ?.

Reggie} Whatever, Dallas, you did your thing and you blew it, we got a broken door in the end, so .

Dallas} It wasn’t my fault, wasn’t it, it was the wind . { Reggie walks off but then the locksmiths turn up}

Ponyboy} Oh hang on a minute, are those the locksmiths, it’s about time .

Steve} Well not really, they came when Reggie is furious, he’ll end up murdering them with an axe .

Johnny} And I oop .

{Then the locksmiths walk towards everyone}

Ponyboy} Excuse me, can I help you with anything ?.

Locksmith} Uh yeah, I’m here for a report of a broken door, I’m here to fix it, um, is there anyone named Mister Mustafa Bancroft ?.

Ponyboy} Oh yeah, he was here a while ago, he’s gone a little ballistic, you see, we pissed him off today and he’s not happy about it, unfortunatly .

Locksmith} Oh dear, is everything alright now ?.

Ponyboy} Well not really, he’s still angry about it and I don’t think that he’ll ever let it go, it would be a miracle if he does .

Johnny} Uh huh, it would definetely be a miracle, one day when he’s not crazy is very much needed .

Locksmith} Well how about I do you a favor, I fix the door and you guys help me do it .

{Then Johnny and Pony start nodding} ” Yes yes that will be fantastic, what will we do to help you ?”

Locksmith} Well you can help me hold the door and I’ll do the rest .

Ponyboy} Ok well, he’s gonna be back any minute now so we better get started .

Locksmith} Okey dokey .

{A few minutes later}

{Reggie’s read}

” This is just stupid now, how the hell am I gonna live with a broken door, not to mention those idiots who didn’t come to help me at all, I’m just pissed off about the boys as well, they thought that it would be a good idea to slack off and let hell break loose around them ” .

{A few minutes later, the locksmiths get the door fixed and Johnny and Pony helped them to do it, then they just wait in a line until Reggie comes back}

Locksmith} Alright guys, I fixed the door, spick and span, good as new, just tell the youth worker that we stopped by .

Ponyboy} Ok great, thanks a lot, man, I appreciate it and I’m sure that Reggie will appreciate it too .

Locksmith} Yeah, I’m sure he will, ok well, I better get going, I got a phone call from another patient, saying that she’s locked out of her apartment, all that Jazz .

Ponyboy} Oh tell me about it, chaos, hahaha, oh well, thanks for helping us .

Locksmith} Yeah, thanks for having me, definetely couldn’t do it on myself, it’s a three man job .

Ponyboy} Yeah, oh hey, do you want some tips, how could I repay you ?.

Locksmith} Oh please, you don’t need to give me anything, I’ll do it for free .

Ponyboy} Oh ok then, well bye now, good luck with your next job .

Locksmith} Thanks man, take care of yourself .

Ponyboy} Bye . { They both wave} { Then the locksmiths walk off and get in their van}

Ponyboy} Woooooooo hoooo, yes, we did it, now we just have to wait for Reggie to turn up .

Johnny} Woooooooo, Reggie’s gonna be so surprised when he sees us standing here .

Ponyboy} Wait, I got an idea, we should go, it’s gonna be a surprise, we don’t want him to know that it was us .

{Johnny runs and hides behind a wall}

{A few minutes later, Reggie turns up and he kicks a trash can over and stumbles around in anger}

Reggie} Oh for god sake, stupid bin, stupid wind and those stupid fools, I just can’t wait to get a phone and shove it up their a …… { Stops and realizes that the door is fixed}

Reggie} Oh my gosh, this cannot be real life, but it was broken a while ago, what is this ?.

{Pony and Johnny laughing whilst they hide behind the wall} Ponyboy} That’s what she said .

Reggie} It’s almost like good as new, but how, this is not how I remembered it .

{ They start counting silently, Then Pony and Johnny slowly get out from behind the wall and show themselves}

Ponyboy} Three men vs one broken door, who goes first ?.

Johnny} The ones who fixed the door of course .

Ponyboy} Well I don’t know, because it looks like the guy is here to put up a fight .

Reggie} What on earth are you guys doing ?.

Ponyboy} You wanna kill us now ?.

Reggie} What ?.

Ponyboy} You said that you were gonna kill us, well what are you waiting for, go for it, you might as well, we are here now, so .

Reggie} No I’m not doing it, no, there is a fixed door there, where did it come from ?.

{ Johnny and Pony make gestures to give Reggie the indication to say that they did it}

{ Then Reggie freezes and goes to hug them} ” You didn’t do this, did you ?.

Johnny} Who says we didn’t ?.

Reggie} But you never do stuff like this ?, why are you being so nice to me ?.

Johnny} We wanted to make up with you with all of the bad things that we did earlier .

Ponyboy} Yeah so the locksmiths turned up and we helped them fix the door .

Reggie} That is brilliant, that is, now I can go in the office and take a nap .

Johnny} Oh wait look, there’s a note on the door, where did that come from ?.

Ponyboy} I don’t know, maybe Reggie should check it out . { Winks at Johnny}

{Reggie goes to read the note}

Ponyboy} What does it say ?.

{ Reggie freezes and smiles as he reads the note} ” I, go away, you think you can fool me, not today ” .

 

{Ponyboy’s read}

” Yeah he has properly lost his shit, he is so disappointed in us, but that doesn’t mean that I regret doing what we did, I’m glad that me and Johnny went to the park and did what we did, it was fun, if anything, it was a once in a lifetime experience, but who knows, maybe I’ll do it again some time ” .

{Johnny’s read}

” This has definetely been the best day of my life and that’s not it, every day is a new opportunity to get back at someone ” .

{Johnny and Ponyboy go in Reggie’s office and pranks him by putting a chunk of bark on his desk, they got the chunk of bark from the park}

{They tip toe and silently walking up to the desk because Reggie is fast asleep, resting his head on his desk}

{Ponyboy puts the chunk of bark on the desk and stands there in the corner. { Starts laughing his head off}

{When they are done, they leave the office in one peace}

{Then they hear screaming, it came from Reggie as he ran out of the office, screaming and panicking} Ahhhhhhhhhh, Shitttttt, oh my god .

{Then Ponyboy and Johnny start laughing} ” Yeah heh heh heh, that’s how we do it in New York ” .

{Then it ends with Pony and Johnny jumping and doing a freeze frame}

End of mocumentary script .