Posted on February 26, 2021
In The City, Mocumentary Script, The News
{First scene, Tucker is walking outside his house }
Tucker} Have you ever wondered on how houses are built, every time I look at them I think that they just look dumb , you know, why are they designed like that, might as well just live in a green house .
{Jason’s read}
” So yeah, today is a very exciting day, Tucker has got his first day of work, he’s gonna be a journalist , I don’t know on how he feels about it but I’d prefer that he gave it a go , and if he doesn’t like it, the door’s right there, you know what I mean ?.
{ Everybody’s in Jason’s office}
Delsin} Jason, does this face say anything to you ?.
Jason} Delsin, what gives ?.
Delsin} Everything gives, just get on with it .
Jason} Ok so, today, Tucker is having his first day of work .
Tucker} It is true, I feel like it’s a stupid improvement of my life .
Jason} Come on Tucker, why don’t you give it a go ?.
Tucker} Why should I give it a go, it isn’t gonna do anything but form a big hole and it’s gonna suck me into it .
Leroy} To be honest, I think that Tucker should give it a go .
Tucker} Of course you do, of course you do .
Jason} Tucker, do you actually know on what you do in this job ?.
Tucker} Um yes, let’s see, um, they just talk shite in a microphone .
Jason} No, they don’t do that, have you seen Journalists on the tv ?.
Tucker} Um yes and no, I try to avoid it, when they start talking, it makes the inside of my body go, wwwwwppp { makes a weird noise}
{ Tucker’s read}
” I don’t really know on how I feel about the Journalist job, it sounds like a pile of junk to me, and I don’t want to turn into a pile of junk myself .
Jason} You know what, I think that you should give it a go .
Tucker} Oh my god, you don’t know anything, don’t you ?, nothing deserves a go .
Jason} You know what, let me just show you a video, one sec .
{ Then he puts on the video}
{ The video plays}
Tucker} What, is that what they do ?.
Jason} Well yes, it’s quite an exciting job .
Tucker} I’m sorry but, saying that is not gonna change the fact of being a journalist .
Jason} They pay you 200 quid an hour .
Tucker} Woah really ?.
Jason} Yes .
{ Jason’s read}
” Hah hah hah heh heh, I can’t believe I told him that they pay their employees , 200 quid an hour, I’m surprised that it worked, I think that it would always change his mind, money makes the world go round for him , so yeah , um, I actually feel guilty for telling him , think I should go and tell him the truth .
Tucker} Alright, I’ll give it a go .
Jason} That’s great to hear, Tucker, do you want me to give you a lift ?.
Tucker} Yeah, that would be great, thanks mate .
{ They are now in the car, driving to work}
Jason} Tucker, just to mention before you attend work, don’t mention anything about what journalists do, it’ll put them off .
Tucker} Alright fine, why are you making me nervous for, I’m already quite nervous as it is .
Jason} I’m not making you nervous .
Tucker} Yep, yep , yes you are , you are pressuring me to no good .
{ Tucker enters the building}
Manager} Alright, anyone here named Tucker ?.
Tucker} Yes, right here .
Manager} Welcome Tucker, I’m gonna be your manager, I’m Charlie, are you looking forward to participating in this job ?.
Tucker} Yes, I am kind of looking forward to it, it’s a new me .
Manager} That’s great to hear, ok, are you ready to get started ?.
Tucker} Yes .
Manager} Great, ok, you are gonna be on air in about 4 minutes, so get ready and make your way downstairs , ok, off you go, good luck .
Tucker} Okey dokey .
{ Few minutes later}
{ Meanwhile, Tucker is outside, talking on air}
Another journalist} What have you got for us, do you have an update for us, what has been happening over the last few days ?.
Tucker} Well yes, it has been quite hectic, people running like mad in the streets, a toilet paper shortage, mars bars have been given a higher price, it is chaotic .
The Journalist} Yes it does sound chaotic, what are your opinions on the following problems ?.
Tucker} Well yes, it’s too much to handle, it’s been crazy .
{ Then suddenly, Leroy and Delsin appear in the back round, and they start beating the shit out of each other}
Tucker} Yeah, but we’ll sort that out .
{ The filming stops, Tucker is walking back to the building}
Tucker} I think that that went well .
{ Meanwhile, Jason is in his office, watching the news}
Jason} What is this ?.
{ Then he rings Tucker}
{Tucker picks up the phone}
Tucker} Hello Jason .
Jason} Omg Tucker .
Tucker} What is it ?.
Jason} Omg Tucker .
Tucker} Huh ?, I’ll talk to you later .
{ He makes his way back to Jason’s office}
Tucker} Hey Jason, I’m back .
Jason} Tucker, what the hell happened today ?.
Tucker} What, I went to work, what’s going on ?.
Jason} Omg this is an absolute nightmare, Look at this{ He zooms into the back round of the news report piece}
Tucker} Huh. what the hell is that ?.
Jason} Who is that, tell me, who the heck is that ?.
Tucker} A new comer , I see, there’s nothing there .
Jason} No. those 2 people right there, throttling each other .
Tucker} What, this can’t be true, they look like Delsin and Leroy .
Jason} What if it is Delsin and Leroy ?.
Tucker} But it can’t be, they are here .
Jason} Uh uh, no they are not, they were out, I didn’t see them until 2 o clock .
Tucker} Oh no, oh no, oh no, what the hell ?, I feel like I’m gonna be sick .
Jason} Where are they, actually ?.
Tucker} I have no idea .
{ Delsin and Leroy come through the door}
Delsin} Hey Jason and Tucker, You alright ?.
Jason} , Leroy, look at this . { He points at the screen}
Delsin} Oh my goodness, what’s happening there ?.
Jason} Don’t pretend that you don’t know, I know that it was you 2 .
Delsin} First of all, I never knew that there were 52 journalists taking snaps every few seconds .
Tucker} Yes you did, can’t you see in front of you ?.
Leroy} What were we doing there ?.
Delsin} I don’t know, you tell me .
Tucker} I was there doing a news report, this isn’t Cobra Kai .
Jason} What the hell, you know that everybody’s gonna see this, we are doomed .
Tucker} Also another thing, about the payment, why did you tell me that they pay you 200 quid an hour ?.
Jason} Well, I don’t bloody know, I’m not a genie , how much did they pay you ?.
Tucker} What like about 2 pounds an hour .
Delsin} Oh my, what a downgrade .
Leroy} Why did they pay you 2 pounds ?.
Tucker} I don’t know, Probably because, of you 2 beating the crap out of each other .
Tucker} And what was that , you were doing ?, Karate ?.
Delsin} It wasn’t even my fault, Leroy went mad with the flipping credit card, got in debt .
Leroy} Don’t put it on me , you were the one who started it off .
Tucker} Probably because of this, I’ll get fired .
{ Tucker has a memory, on thinking on how it would be if he got fired from his job}
In his memory}
Manager} Tucker, I have only 1 thing to say to you, you are fired , get out , just get out .
{ Then it goes back to normal}
Tucker} Omg, I could just see the headlines coming through now, ” Journalist gets sacked from his job ” , it’s a bloody nightmare, all thanks to you 3 maniacs, no job now, jobless, and I’d be skint, if you need me, I’ll be head butting a wall, Adios . { Then he trips on the carpet on the way out } .
{Leroy starts giggling}
{Tucker’s read} { While still walking off}
” I am done with everything, if I had to walk out of this thing all together, I will do so, do I make myself clear ?.
Jason} No, Tucker, it was a mistake, you should give it another go, it won’t happen again .
Tucker} Why should I, absolutely not, I would be cluding , if you were stupid enough, to go along with this, good for you or bad for you , I am not prepared to have any part in it .
Jason} Ok, that’s fine, see ya tomorrow .
{Tucker’s read}
” I am done everything ” .
{ He comes back in the office}
Leroy} Have you had a think about it ?.
Tucker} Yeah, I am not gonna have any part in something that is a complete and utter injustice, you can all bugger off, I’m going home .
{Leroy starts giggling and dying inside}
Tucker} Goodbye , turn the cameras off, stop filming me, the show’s over .
Leroy} Oh geez, the shit has hit the fan, I already knew it would .
Jason} Leroy, Please, not now .
{Tucker’s read}
” I don’t even care about the job, I am born free, all I can say now is ” Bye bye ” .
End of Mocumentary script .