In The City, Mocumentary Script, Delsin And The Therapist

{First scene, Tucker is standing near a bus stop}

Tucker} Yeah, I don’t quite know on what’s gonna happen today, to be honest, Jason just keeps admitting us to his office but there’s no reason or purpose for that, it’s like a merry go round, you just go round in circles, and sometimes, if you’re lucky, you get a stunt man who has a bucket and it throws shit at you, I don’t even understand why he does this, what’s the point of that, honestly .

{Next scene, Everybody is in Jason’s office}

Tucker} Why are we here ?.

Jason} Well, today, there’s gonna be an event, that I should probably tell you about .

Tucker} What event, and where is Delsin ?.

Jason} Delsin is just in another room at the moment .

Leroy} Why is he in another room , none of this makes any sense to me .

Jason} Ok well, I called a therapist to come and have a session with Delsin .

Tucker} Are you taking the piss ?.

Jason} No, I caught him, last night, hitting the toilet seat with a pick axe .

Tucker} Listen, yeah, if you are making this shit up, you need to see one yourself .

Jason} No, he has gone completely nuts, he keeps telling me that he’s Ronnie Pickering, he’s gone too far .

Tucker} Right, and what does Delsin think about all of this ?.

Jason} He is kind of fine about this .

Leroy} Bullshit .

Jason} Excuse me ?.

Leroy} You are talking a lot of bullshit, he isn’t fine about this, if he found out about this, he is gonna run after you with a base ball bat .

Jason} No, I’m calling a therapist, and that’s all there is to it, ok, you guys can tell me nothing .

Tucker} Ok then, don’t come running to me when he finds out that all of this is a set up .

Jason} Yeah yeah yeah, should be fine .

{Jason’s read}

” So yeah, today I have payed for a session with a therapist for Delsin because he is a maniac .

{ A few minutes later, the therapist is in the room with Delsin , Leroy, Tucker and Jason, and they are sitting down very awkward and pissed}

Delsin} What the heck is this, what the heck is this ?.

Jason} I brang a therapist in for you .

Delsin} Heh ?.

Jason} There is a therapist here, and she is going to ask you questions .

Delsin} You are taking the piss, there’s one question that I’m going to answer, and that is that you are the joker .

Jason} Shhh, Delsin, the therapist can hear us, she’s sitting right there .

Delsin} I give zero shits about the therapist, you should know that, I’d be surprised if you don’t .

{Jason starts talking to the therapist}

Jason} Yes excuse me, Ms, can you get the session going, I can’t stop Lawrence from talking absolute rubbish .

Therapist} Ok so, what is the problem ?.

Jason} Ok well, this idiot, right here, I found him hitting a toilet seat with a pick axe at 11 pm .

Delsin} It wasn’t a pick axe, it was a stick .

Jason} Don’t care, ok so, yeah, he almost smashed the toilet in the cubical in the office .

Therapist} Ok interesting, and um, are there any more problems that you’d like to share ?.

Jason} Yeah, and he keeps assuming that he is Ronnie Pickering .

Therapist} Really, and who is that ?.

Delsin} It is me, how many times do I have to tell you ?.

Jason} See, you can clearly see that he is mental .

Delsin} No, I am not mental, you are, who are you calling mental ?.

Jason} See, this is the sort of thing that I have to put up with .

Therapist} Ok, and what is his name ?.

Delsin} It’s Ronnie Pickering .

Jason} No, it’s Delsin, don’t write Ronnie Pickering down, you better not have bloody write Ronnie Pickering down .

Therapist} Excuse me, one at a time, I can’t hear both of you talk at the same time .

Delsin} Oh for, you are one big joke, you know dat ?.

Therapist} Excuse me ?.

Delsin} You and Jason are jokers, if you try to assume that I need help or a therapist, I don’t care, you guys can be strangers in the night .

Jason} Delsin , cut it out .

Delsin} No, I am not gonna cut it out, ok, you can, and I bet that there is nothing that you can cut out .

Jason} Delsin, sit down .

Delsin} Hah, are you taking the mickey ?.

Jason} Just go outside, now .

Delsin} Ok I’ll go outside, but if you are gonna get rid of that therapist, why not go out with a bang, cause she’s gonna need it, good day sir, good day . { Then he walks out}

Jason} I apologize .

{ Then Delsin just shouts in the corridors}

{ Then it shows Jason, Leroy and Tucker just staring into the camera}

Delsin} Absolute jokers, jokers, man, absolute jokers, the lot of them .

{ Meanwhile, Delsin is having a go at Jason}

Delsin} You get me a therapist again, I’ll chop your arms off, ok ?.

Jason} What’s wrong with you, don’t you know on how to communicate with people ?.

Delsin} No I don’t, I told you that , 1 year ago, you still haven’t learned from that .

Jason} Did you see the chaos on what’s happening in that room, the therapist is balling her eyes out, I had to lock the door and apologize 10 or 20 times .

Delsin} Why did you even call a therapist, what in the almighty world made you want to do that ?.

Jason} Cause you’re a phychpath, that’s why .

Delsin} Ok, there’s only 2 words for this discussion, bye bye . { Then he walks off} ” Bloody therapist ” .

End of mocumentary script .