In The City, Mocumentary Script, Feeding The Dustbins More shit Then You Need To

Warning. This script contains strong language and adult humor .

{First scene, Tucker is hanging around in a hideout den}

Tucker} Yeah, um, this is the place that I hang around in, I may sleep here too, Jason probably thinks that I’m a tramp, but who cares, you’re gonna die anyway, so, just do what you want .

{Next scene, Everybody’s in Jason’s office}

Delsin} Do you think that this is funny, is this funny to you, putting us through shit, by dragging us in your office ?.

Jason} What do you mean ?, I think that this is nice, a little chin wag .

Delsin} No, no no no no, it’s not nice, you don’t know what it’s like to be doing this .

Jason} I do .

Delsin} That’s a lie  .

Tucker} Why did you even bring us here, in the first place ?.

Jason} Well um, I just wanted to talk to about the recycling .

Delsin} Hah omg, are you taking the piss ?.

Jason} No, absolutely not, why would I be taking the piss and not be  taking my job seriously ?.

Delsin} But you don’t take your job seriously, though, that’s the thing, like .

Jason} Of course I do, what do you think I’m doing now ?.

Delsin} You are dancing with 5 dancing dogs, is that your job, no .

Jason} I’m not dancing with the dogs, I’m talking to you guys .

Delsin} Are you sure, cause to me, it doesn’t look like it .

Leroy} Omg, man, just let the man talk, already .

Jason} Thank you, Leroy, ok so, I need some help with the dustbins here .

Tucker} Why do you need help ?.

Jason} Well, um, I have been thinking that, the dustbins need a revamp .

Delsin} Omg, revamp, what do you want us to do, paint it pink ?.

Jason} No, nothing like that, I’m just gonna think through some new design choices, is that too much to ask for ?.

Delsin} Yes it is, cause, I am not designing a dustbin, who am I, the dustbin man ?.

Tucker} Why are you making us do this ?.

Jason} What do you mean, ” Why am I making you do this ”, and the reason is, that it takes more then one person to do the job .

Tucker} Heh, you call that a job ?.

Delsin} What so, making somebody going ape shit on a dustbin is a job, you have lost your head, mate .

{ Delsin’s read}

” Dustbins, seriously ?, oh my god, Jason’s head is a dustbin, let alone us having to paint it ” .

Jason} You don’t go ape shit on a dustbin, that wasn’t even part of the plan .

Delsin} Are you sure that it wasn’t, cause, you just push it with both of the legs and end up in it .

Jason} Omg Delsin, when will you learn ?, when will you learn ?.

Delsin} Learn what ?.

Jason} When will you learn that dustbins aren’t meant to be used for trolley carts ?.

Delsin} I have already learnt, you just can’t see it .

{ Jason’s read}

” When did dustbins become a unessary subject, back in my day it wasn’t like that, every time you mention it now, you end up in one yourself .

Jason} When did dustbins become the bane of your existence ?.

Delsin} That’s actually a great question, um, search it up on google, I bet that google doesn’t even know it itself, hmm, needs to do more research , but that’s nothing to do with me, ask um, Larry Page and Sergey Brin .

Jason} Would you like to see the dustbin ?.

Delsin} Do you want me to bring a chainsaw ?.

Jason} Oh for goodness sake, Delsin, just get a move on .

Delsin} Is there a way that I can get a move on with out moving on .

{Jason staring at Delsin}

{Jason pushing Delsin in a bin}

Jason} Go go go go go .

Delsin} Weeeee .

{ They finally get outside}

Jason} Ok, here you go, a few bins, I see .

Delsin} Yeah yeah yeah, hurry up Jason, you’re not on Antiques Roadshow, just look around you, there are people thinking you are nuts .

Jason} Oh for god sake, walk on, please, nothing to see here . { Jason trying to shoo the people away}

Tucker} Ok well, what are we gonna be doing then ?, you pulled us out here to see the malaky, where’s the malarky ?.

Jason} Oh, they are right here, maybe if you had eyes, you’d be able to see that .

Leroy} Ok well, where are the paints ?.

Jason} Oh, we are not gonna be using paints .

Leroy} Well, what are we gonna be using ?.

Jason} Something better then that .

Delsin} hhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee .

Jason} Delsin, do you want me to put you in the dustbin again ?.

Delsin} When will there ever be a time where I can put you in there ?.

Jason} Oh for crying out loud  . { losing it} ” aghhhhhhhhhhh  { Pushes the dustbin in the road}

Delsin}  Woah, all the fun of the fair, watch it go, watch it go, hah hah, I’m loving this .

{Jason getting ready to punch Delsin in the face}

Delsin} Oh dear me .

{ Delsin’s read}

” Jason belongs in a nut house, mate, he is bloody nuts .

Tucker} Oh my, hah hah, iconic, got it all on tape .

{Jason looks at Tucker}

Tucker} Why don’t we go inside, I’ll make a cup of tea .

Jason} Don’t want a bloody cup of tea .

Tucker} Yeah yeah, of course you do, you’re definetly asking for it, let’s face it .

{Tucker pushes Jason through the door and closes it}

Tucker} Ok goodbye, maniac .

{ Few minutes later}

{Tucker is still outside}

{Jason going nuts}

Jason} Tucker, Tucker, what are you doing, get out, just get out .

{Tucker laughing his head off}

Tucker} Oh no, I should run, ahhhhh, ahh, ahh, ahhh .

{Jason opens the door and runs out}

Jason} Why are you running ?, why are you running ?.

{ Tucker’s read}

” That one moment when you want to have to dustbin to hide away from a phycho, left it in the bloody park .

End of Mocumentary script .