In The City, Mocumentary Script, Taking Shit From Everyone

{ First Scene, Tucker is walking around}

” Ok so, there’s something else that I need to show you, so here, we used to throw disco parties, and one time, Jason payed an Elvis impersonator to come and perform, so he came, and he started singing, and turns out, he started singing bloody Wonderwall by Oasis, it is absolutely baffling , payed him 100 quid as well , can’t think about it anymore, it’s gonna make my head explode .

{ Next scene, everybody’s talking to Jason outside}

Delsin} Hello Jason, what brings you here , ready to waste our time again ?.

Jason} No, what is this negative energy ?.

Delsin} Oh, I wish I knew, honestly .

Tucker} Ok, so why are you talking to us ?.

Jason} Well, I thought I’d show you the nature out doors .

Delsin} Oh no, I am not watering the plants, I’m not a gardener, thank you very much .

Jason} No, you are not gonna be watering the plants .

Delsin} Well, what are we gonna be doing then ?.

Jason} We are just gonna have a chat and walk around for a bit .

Leroy} That is the lamest thing that I have ever heard .

Jason} Come on, it’ll be good .

Delsin} Everything to you is good .

Tucker} Why can’t we just go and sit in the office ?.

Jason} Ok, then we’ll go .

{ They went in and sat down in his office}

Delsin} Alright Jason, you dragged us in here, and now we are here, what do you want from us ?.

Jason} Well, I was gonna over some things with you .

Leroy} What things ?.

Tucker} Can I just say something, if you are gonna mention anything about that cardboard box outside, I don’t care .

Jason} What cardboard box ?.

Tucker} Oh you don’t know, it’s this box what I left outside for a project .

Jason} What project ?.

Tucker} Oh it was to test if cats come and shit .

Jason} Right .

Tucker} Yeah because, cats just shit everywhere, but it happens in a certain amount of time .

Jason} Ok enough .

{ Moment of silence}

Delsin} Hey Jason, can I just tell you something ?.

Jason} Yes of course, what is it ?.

Delsin} Why are we talking shit ?.

Leroy} Oh, you’re asking him .

Delsin} Yeah, he has the answer to everything .

Jason} I don’t have the answers .

Delsin} Yes you do .

{ Delsin’s read}

” Jason can get us wrapped up in a lot of shit, deep down, he’s the worst out of all of us .

Delsin} You are telling me that you don’t have the answers, well listen to this, don’t give a shit .

Jason} Well you should .

Delsin} Don’t tell me on what to do, unless you wanna dive head first into the shit first .

{ Tucker’s read}

” Jason is one of those sorts of people who you leave far behind, if you get to know him, he is a nutcase, it’s not what it looks like behind the lense , trust me , if you meet him, you’ll want to jump out of a window .

Delsin} This is a god damn farce .

Jason} What are you trying to say ?.

Delsin} This is shit, it’s bloody instinct, how many fingers am I holding up ? { Gets up and shows 3 fingers}

Jason} What are you trying to do to me ?.

Delsin} I don’t know .

{ Leroy’s read}

” Yeah, I think that Lawrence can go slightly out of his mind. Once, when we went to the shops, he got fustrated because the guy behind the cashier forgot to give him the receipt and then Lawrence picked up a mars bar and threw it at him, yeah, apart from that, he’s alright .

Tucker} Woah. Delsin, calm down .

Delsin} Who are you to tell me to calm down, you my friend, you have verbal diarrhea .

Tucker} Verbal diarrhea ?.

Delsin} Yes, don’t think that you’d like to know what that is .

{ Jason’s read}

” Delsin can really kick off, once, he almost threw a shoe at Tucker, and it was like a very chunky shoe, it was in fact a plim sole, yeah, he’s kind of a maniac .

 

{Leroy’s read}

” Every time there’s an fight, if Lawrence is involved in it, the shit will really hit the fan, and when it does, it takes ages to clean .

{ Delsin’s read}

I don’t give a crap about what people say about me, I’ll just get my words out, that is my personality, and if you don’t like it, then you can piss off .

End of mocumentary script