Posted on February 10, 2021
In The City Mocumentary Script, People
{ Everybody’s walking outside}
{Jason turns up out of nowhere}
Tucker} Is that Jason ?.
{ They walk up to him}
Tucker} Hi, Jason .
Jason} Hi, can I just have a chat with you guys , I promise I won’t waste any of your time .
Tucker} Yeah fine .
{ They walk in and sit down in his office}
Leroy} Why did you call us in ?.
Jason} Well, I just want to go over some problems with you .
Delsin} Omg, what problems, it’s like one after the other with you .
Jason} Just bare with me, so, there’s a person who’s looking to buy a house in the area , so I’d .
Tucker} A person, ay, who is it ?.
Jason} I don’t actually know, but I want you guys to meet her and welcome her .
Delsin} Why do we need to welcome her, she can welcome herself .
Leroy} Yeah, they don’t come, saying hello to us, so why should we do it to them ?.
Jason} Come on guys, don’t you want to make friends ?.
Delsin} Not really .
Jason} Why not ?.
Delsin} Friends don’t go , parking their car in your parking space, friends don’t do that .
Tucker} Yeah, I’m very happy with Leroy and Lawrence , no further information .
Leroy} Yeah, it’s too complicated, 3’s ok .
Jason} Why are you guys so ignorant ?.
Delsin} We are not ignorant, you probably like people because you were born in council centers .
Jason} I wasn’t born in a council center , it’s just a thing that you get used to .
Leroy} Hah, used to ?.
Tucker} Are you fooling around with us ?.
Jason} No , you guys should get engaged in it, you might like it .
Delsin} Oh no no no no no, it isn’t possible .
Leroy} Liking people is not a headline in my CV.
{ Jason looks out of the window and spots the person}
Tucker} Jason, why are you looking out of the window, are you paranoid ?.
Delsin} Is that the ice cream van, I want an ice cream, I love a bloody magnum .
Jason} No, the visitor’s here .
Tucker} Oh great, there’s gonna be a party, geez, he pisses me off so much { Says sarcastically}
Jason} Hello, this is the visitor, she’s thinking of moving here, this is Jess, Jess this is Delsin. { Introduces them to the visitor}
Delsin} Hello Jess .
Jason} And this is Leroy .
Leroy} Hey .
Jess} Hey .
Jason} And this is Tucker .
Jess} Hi .
Tucker} Hello .
Jason} Ok, so, do you want me to show you around ?.
Jess} Yes please .
{ Jess and Jason leave the office}
Delsin} Geez, when did meeting people get so vile ?.
Tucker} I know right .
Leroy} Geez, look at Jason, he looks like he’s about to piss himself, yeah, he’s shagging her, thought so, no surprise from Jason, he’s a bloody embarassment .
Delsin} Yeah .
{A few minutes later}
{Jason turns up }
Tucker} Oh hello, Jason, found your other half yet ?.
Jason} What are you talking about ?.
Leroy} You looked like you were about to piss yourself, do you usually do that around people ?.
Jason} No, don’t be silly, I weren’t pissing myself .
Tucker} Oh and I think that you fancy her .
Jason} That is absolute nonsense, I don’t fancy her, I’m already married .
Delsin} Ok, and what will your wife think about that ?.
Jason} Omg, { Face palms and leaves the room}
Delsin} He’s probably going to the toilet .
{ Meanwhile, Delsin, Tucker and Leroy are outside talking to Jason}
Jason} What the actual hell was that about ?.
Delsin} What was what about ?.
Jason} The house letting thing .
Delsin} Oh yeah, brushed up on that, haven’t you ?.
Jason} Bloody hell, what were you thinking, we were meeting new people and you’re standing there like she’s a virus, I mean, what was wrong with you ?.
Delsin} What was I supposed to do, stand there, saying, would you like to sing in this flipping karaoke machine, it’s not a circus party .
{ Delsin’s read}
” Jason’s like , ” Oh, lets all be happy families, only to actually notice that you can’t be one if you are with stupid house customers , he’s in a bloody dream land, and when he loses his marbles , it looks like a massive ticking bomb, he’s go red and , bang .
End of script .